Sunday, May 8, 2011

my day

i feel like this is my first real mothers day.

last year we had 8 week old twins and the notion of seizing the moment and appreciating what this day means was no where in sight. reality was no where in sight.

this year, i get it.

i know how it feels to have the two biggest beating pieces of my heart walking around outside of my body.

i watch you both in awe not believing i made you.

my favorite part of our day is when you wake up. you both crawl on my lap, drink your milk and we watch sesame street.

during this time, i make a conscious effort to be present. to hug you both. and to literally feel my love for you pour out of my body and into yours. at that moment i think yup, this is what it's supposed to feel like.

if you both wake up every morning and go to sleep every night knowing that i loved you every second of the day then i will feel like i've done my job.

and to the little girl in my belly, as much as i can't wait to meet you, know that i am loving this time when you are trapped in my belly and you are all mine.

and to my mamma.....

thank you for guiding me and teaching me so many invaluable lessons.

thank you for teaching me to cook, craft, bake and for fostering my creativity.

thank you for decorating for every holiday making our house feel magical.

thank you for answering the phone in the middle of the night to help me realize my self diagnosed terminal illness is by no means not terminal at all. phewww.

thanks for kissing me back to health and happiness.

and most of all

thank you for constantly telling me how much you love me.

thank you to my stepmom for coming in to our lives as we were monsters (my words, not hers) and loving us still.

and to my sweet husband, you are a gem. thank you for making me the mamma to the most amazing children on this planet. for me, being a mother will be my greatest legacy. the best thing i will have ever done. thank you for doing such an amazing job walking by my side. you are my best friend and i love watching you as a father.


  1. What an great day. My girls are the best Moms, ever!

  2. I like this post, and I like your babies.

  3. This post made me cry, I'll admit I'm pregnant and therefore hormonal but you really have a gift with words.... And you make me look forward to being a mom even more :)

  4. Wow! What an amazing way to cap off one of the best Mother's Days in my life. Being able to celebrate this day with my Mom is nothing short of miraculous - a reminder that God is so good! Being a Mom to the three most incredible kids ever is the largest part of who and what I am. You are such an amazing gift and blessing that I really can't put it into words - especially not as eloguently as you are able. I have now discovered that a very special reward in this thing called motherhood is seeing your babies become parents and I have the honor of watching all of you blossom and flourish. It is the greatest compliment to who I am. (and no, I don't mean I'm taking all the credit!) Watching you carry on family traditions and embellishing them with your own magic touch makes my heart so full! Every Mother's Day I reflect and try to recall as many of those tiny, day to day, special moments from the second of your birth until now and it always brings tears of joy and a heart filled with the most phenomenal love ever. People always say to savor these times when your babies are little because they are so fleeting and they are so right. If I can impart any wisdom to you my beautiful daughter, it would be to be present as much as you are able and know that these moments are gone in the blink of an eye, shoot a LOT of video and take lots of pictures. (hmmmm, I don't think I need to remind you of this last one!), and jot down all those incredibly cute things your babies say and do. In years ahead, as you look back, I'm pretty sure that these first few years of motherhood will be a blur but I want you to be reminded of as much as you can. Watching you as a wife and a mother brings me true joy. Colton, Chloe & BIB (baby in belly) - you are so lucky to have a MOST amazing Mom! I love you Baby Girl and thanks for making my 32nd Mother's Day one of the best ever!!

  5. so sweet, I definitely cried. love you and your sweet family. you are an awesome momma, xoxo

  6. What an amazing post! My favorite line is "i watch you both in awe not believing i made you." Beautiful. And to answer your question, we're not 100% sure if the girls are identical or fraternal. They each had their own sacs and placentas, so odds are they are fraternal. When they were little, it was really hard to tell them a part, but now that they're getting a bit older, most people can tell them a part. There are pretty distinct differences (head shape, ear shape, forehead, eyes etc), BUT I know of a few identical twins that I can tell a part for those reasons. So... we're pretty sure they're fraternal, but if we get asked (or told) that they're identical, I usually don't put up a fight. We could have their DNA tested, but it hasn't been a big enough deal for us to have it done.

    With girl/boys twins do you get comments about them being 'real' twins? I have a friend with g/b twins, and people ask if she's sad she didn't have 'real twins'. Um...what? People are weird. :)